Welcome to Summer,
Since you and your child may be spending time with some new people or
family this summer, you will have the chance to invite them to help
your child interact and communicate more. The hopefully more relaxed
times of summer often help children make real gains in socializing.
As your child meets more and more people, you can help him a great
deal by coaching family and friends in ways that help him socialize
and communicate. The more people he interacts with the more he will
learn and the and less alone he will be.
Anyone who knows your child can help.
You might begin with a few suggestions, such as
Say one thing them wait for him or
Make the sounds he makes. or
Talk about what he is doing or
Question less and comment more or
You dont have to talk, playing quiet will help him.
He does best when you act like him. And
She can do a lot more than you may expect.
Show and discuss this with anyone spending much time with your child
family, sitters, teachers, and aides. Keep this list in your purse or
wallet so you get in the habit of changing your childs world in his
favor. Be proud of your child and find new friends for him or her.
Let us know how it works.
HOW YOU CAN HELP MY CHILD DEVELOP.
When a child is delayed or not socially outgoing, he or she needs
people to interact in different ways than is typical. When a child has
autism pdd, aspergers, Down syndrome, cerebral palsy or other
conditions effecting communication, they have special needs of their
life partners if they are to learn and build relationships with
them. Think of the guides below similar to ones you would give to
people if you had a child with diabetes, heart problems, allergies,
special fears, or different learning styles. For example, for a
diabetic child, you would let everyone know how to and how not to feed
and treat them. Similarly with late talking children we need to
let their life partners know how to interact so the child will show
his best and so they will truly see what the child can really do.
HELLO! You can really help my child develop. You do not need
training; you just need to be his partner. The more real friends he
has now, the more he will learn and fit in the world.
Thanks for connecting and helping my child grow.
My child can do more than you think!
My child will learn, communicate and care about you more when you
do some of the following:
Interact WITH not AT my child.
Enter physically in his world and observe him silently for a short
Become aware of his interests and ability level.
Then, gently join into his activity without disrupting it.
Do what the child is doing.
Do not do a lot more than he is doing- but be active.
Match his movements; act in ways he can try to do.
Respond to his movements with similar, related movements.
Talk about the here and now, about the childs experiences.
Be animated: be more interesting than what is distracting him.
Do more of what you do when he stays with you
Do less of what you do when he leaves you.
Match his speech: talk in ways he can now talk (this will help him
Respond to his speech: show him you are interested.
Wait silently for him to take his turn
Dont just praise him: enjoy him instead; your response is the best
Take turns with action and talk: be sure to give and take.
If you dont understand him, treat it as a foreign language and simply
give him an English word that fits the situation.
Limit your questions and demands: comment instead.
Bottom line: the more you enjoy each other, the more my child will
learn with you.
PS: ALL OF THIS WILL HELP YOUR CHILD
BE MORE SOCIAL AND COMMUNICATIVE AND LEARN MORE.
COMMON PROBLEM:--TOO MUCH TALKING
PARTNER TALKS SO MUCH
THE CHILD GETS TOO LITTLE PRACTICE.
Why is this a problem?:
Not enough practice for a conversation habit.
Learns to be passive.
Learns to talk about others ideas.
Fails to learn turn-taking.
Believes his ideas are not important.
Partner usually gives talking models that are too complicated.
Conversation are short lived when one person runs the show.
CONVERSATION LEADS TO A SOCIAL LIFE MORE THAN LANGUAGE ITSELF.
What can you do to help?
THINK OF CONVERSATION AS A GIVE AND TAKE, A PING-PONG
GAME NOT A LECTURE OR A TEST.
Wait silently for partner to have his turn.
Clearly expect and anticipate him to participate.
Allow his turn at times to be physical and nonverbal.
Accept and respond to a turn even if it is unclear.
Let person know that you want the conversation to continue.
Remind your self that he will learn more when you do only half.
Your child learns language best in conversations.
Make conversation out of physical interactions.
LESS LIKE THIS
MOM: Your birthday's coming. What do you think you will get? I bet
Grandma will get you clothes again. Who will get you toys? What toys
do you want?
Child: Computer games. The ones that...
M: Interrupting. Oh not more of those. you just hide away and get
stuck on those.
C: You can play with me on the computer.
M: Oh you know I am always busy. And I don't understand what you see
C: You could learn.
M: Oh I have too much to do.
MORE LIKE THIS:
MOM: Birthday's coming. Waits looking at child.
Child: I want a train cake. With an engine and a caboose.
M: Any tender cars?
C: Yes one for pigs and horses.
M: They might fight together.
C: Okay, lets have two tender cars.
M: Good idea
CONVERSATIONS DEVELOP BEST WHEN BOTH PARTNERS PARTICIPATE AS MUCH AS
THE OTHER. THE CHILD LEARNS MORE LANGUAGE TOO..
For more see http://www.jamesdmacdonald.org/