this soldier has guts. Too bad his superiors dont.
Dad’s Truck & Camper
4 years ago
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Jesse James
this kid is turning into the most incredible young man. Straight A honor roll. Great at football. Polite, funny, engaging....and up to his Mommy's eyebrows already. Sigh.
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
I am a pretend Auntie again :)
My best friend's daughter had her first baby last night. This kid has been part of our lives since she was 5, every holiday, most weekends, every special event in both of our families lives is spent together. I was visiting last night while she was in labor, and she asked me if I wanted to stay and take some pics...dont hafta ask ME twice girlie. ;)
Beautiful Aislynn Rae was born at 5:25 pm, weighing 7 pounds 6 ounces. She was SO swollen at birth, but even then had gorgeous long curly eyelashes and big blue eyes.
Today, the swelling has gone down, and omg..she is a PRETTY baby. Gonna be a spoiled rotten baby too, if Auntie Chelle can help it. :)
Monday, January 28, 2008
Life lessons
Jim and I had a date last night, we went out for dinner and also checked out the casino. Neither of us are big on gambling, but every year or so, we take a ride and give it a whirl. We generally have NO clue what we are doing, just push the button, pull the handle...hope to hear bells and whistles go off. (For the record...no bells no whistles.) Kristin watched Jesse & Ciarra while we were gone, which was very nice. She is 19 today, grown up into a very intelligent and funny young lady.
Kristin's friend Davey came over to hang out, too, he and Jesse play Guitar Hero till their fingers hurt. Ciarra is pretty independent, she usually watches movies or colors, or plays PS2 in her room. Last night, she was snuggled up with Davey on the couch watching Titanic with them. We got home towards the end of the movie, were Rose uses an axe to free Jack from the pole. I watched her watch that, cringed a little (we dont shelter her, we just..dont....expose her to grownup moveis much..ok maybe we shelter her a little, shes awfully innocent yet) She took the axe part fine, and I watched her watching the movie, kind of curious how she would handle it. It isnt brutal, graphic, or bloody. But there is a lot of death, a lot of high emotion. How would she handle it?
She was fine till the very end of the movie. She asked a few questions, why did that big boat break apart? Did all the people who fell off it die? But those people were nameless, faceless. She seemed to be rooting for Jack and Rose. When the had gone under with the ship, she excitedly called out "Jack! Come up, Rose is right there." She was relieved to see him pop up. She said "good" when Jack put Rose on the board and held her hands. But she got increasingly worried as their faces turned blue and Jack started shaking uncontrollably. I looked at her, and saw tears welling in her eyes. She asked me "Is that real, Mom?" How do you explain that those are actors, but that the story is real, and that many real people died that day? She was very sad, but you could tell she was still intently watching to see the heroe make it through. In Ciarra's world, the good guys always win. Zack and Cody always find a way out of trouble, SpongeBob & Patrick make it through their misadventures. They all live happily ever after in the stories she knows. But not in this one, and this one is so real that it made her think about her own life, her own loves, and losing them.
As Jack slipped under water, she said "Mom, why is Jack falling under the water?" I explained that he was too cold to hold on, and she told me that "Rose should not let go of his hands." I had to explain that Rose let go because Jack had died, and she needed to save herself. Ciarra turned back to watch and snuggled in a little tighter, grabbing my hand and gripping it hard. :( She asked me if Jack would go to Heaven when he died, and I told her yes. I told her that everyone goes to Hevaen someday, that we see the people we love again after we die. She said that her family was not going to die, not ever. I told her gently that everybody dies, that as long as we believed, we would be together again. She looked up at me with big tears streaking her face. And then quietly turned back to the movie.
Rose was old now, and talking to some folks about jack, the boat sinking, and her life. Ciarra had a hard time understanding that that really WAS Rose, and that she was old now. More questions. Why was Rose old, why was she a grandma now (Grandma being anyone who is old and gray) I told her that everyone gets older, that I would be old and a Grandma someday too. Bad answer, Mom. She burst out crying, and told me "No, you stay my mom, forever, you stay you here with me". I guess I am a bad mom, cause I lied to my girl, I told her I would stay this way forever, and be her mom, and not get old. I did explain that she is the same girl she was when she was a baby, just older. She said no, she was not getting old, either, she was going to stay just Ciarra. I knew that this movie was too much for her, too grown up and way too full of loss. When Rose died in her room, I told Ciarra that she was going to Heaven, and that Jack would be there, and they would be happy together again. I have never really paid attention to this movie before, but I was relieved to see them show a youthful Rose running into Jack's arms surrounded by all of the Titanic passengers. It was enough to stop the tears and quell the questions. But still, she clung to my hand, kissed my cheek, and told me that "we arent going to get old, are we mum?" We can talk about that another time, baby girl.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
basketball season is over...for Ciarra anyway
we are blessed to have a rec dept that not only welcomes her, but is encouraging, tolerant, and VERY sweet to her. They teach gently, but they never baby her. I always say "this will be her last year playing..." and then she wants to play and we let her go. I am learning that she doesnt have to be the superstar out there, as long as she is having FUN...and that she is!
Friday, January 25, 2008
Sunday, January 20, 2008
My heart...has found a family
I am told that this precious and beautiful little boy who I can honestly say I love with all of my heart has found a family that wants to bring him home!! I am SO happy, so relieved, SO grateful. I intend to continue sponsoring his adoption, if I can. And I hope to be able to be in touch with them someday, maybe I can meet him one day and thank him for allowing me to heal. Loving Aleksa has been good for me, my heart is healed a bit from the pain of Alex. I think allowing myself to open up and truly allow these strong feelings has been a good thing. He is so special, I can only imagine how he will bless his new family. Hooray for you, little man. may all your dreams come true.
Love & Hate
I've been tagged! Shannon at GabisWorld has tagged me to list my LOVEs & HATEs. Oh boy, here goes:
I love my family so passionately
but I hate doing their laundry!
I love my dogs Blue and Bella
but I hate having animals underfoot in the kitchen
I LOVE my Patriots
I hate that in 2 weeks, the season is over :(
I dearly love my best friend Wendy
and hate that she lives 30 minutes away now
I LOVE girl scout cookies
but hate that they are SO fattening
I love to sleep in
but hate that Jim is an early bird and I wake up alone most days
I love that Ciarra has Down syndrome
but I hate that she has these damn sinus infections all the time.
I love blogging
and hate that I dont have the courage to write..for real
I love Maine
I HATE the cold winters
I love to hear Hunter Michael giggle
and I hate when he cries
I LOVE apple dumplings
and hate that they take SO long to make
I lovelovelove football games my son plays in
I hate poor sportsmanship..all too common
I love to stay up late
I hate being overtired
I love being an American
I hate the divisiveness in our world
I love babies
I hate abortion
I love Jim
I hate worrying about him all the time
thats all, I guess...
I am going to hafta tag some folks tomorrow...bed calls.
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